One Year On…


One whole year. A year of writing. A lot’s happened in the last year and to be honest, I’d like to forget a lot of it. However, there are some bits I don’t want to forget and writing here, my dear reader, is not one of them. Here’s what I’d like to remember.

Over the last year, we’ve written some pretty good things. It seems that you all like our ranked lists, in particular, my Star Wars Character list, which despite being written about, oooh, six months ago, still gets regular hits. You all seem to like it when Benny rants about the stuff he hates, in particular, the Britain’s Got Talent audience, which is actually one of our most popular posts. Your favourite posts however, as described through the use of the most viewed review of all time, over the last year, are:

3rd Place – ‘Life Part 2 – July 2011’ – 184 views – Haggis

Who can forget this post, which essentially told me to stop being a miserable bugger. Ah. Those were the days! I liked this post a lot and I’m not at all surprised that it got the number 3 spot. In fact, I expected it. Haggis. Good job!

2nd Place – ‘Top Ten Favourite Fan Theories’ – 238 views – Benny4700

I don’t like this post. Something about it just didn’t seem right to me. I didn’t know what it was then, and I still don’t know what it is now. All I do know, however, is that you, the reader, enjoyed reading this and shared it with your friends, who in turned enjoyed watching it, until finally, it achieved the number one spot, before being pipped at the post at the last minute…

1st Place – ‘That Guy’s Top 20: Star Wars Characters’ – 260 views – That Guy

WOAH! I get first place? Blimey! Thank you all for making this become a reality. I genuinely appreciate it. How many views? Quite a few. It averages out at, oooh, 1.5 views a day, roughly, with my basic maths and prediction skills. Must be a great post, right? Well, wait until you see my next two. They are going to be, wait for it… SPECTACULAR!

However, I feel compelled to take my metaphorical hat off to Benny, for achieving a 6/10 score on our top 10 list. I mean, WOAH! Of the top ten posts, he’s written six? Ben. Good work. I mean it. I really do…

*****

So, that’s the end of the best posts. How about the writers? Well, in my opinion, we’ve had some pretty good writers over the last year. Some of them have been with us for a long time, others not so long. We’ve still got some and, sadly, some of them have left us, probably never to return. Compiled here is a list of all of the writers we have had over the last year, along with whether they remain a member of our team or not.

That Guy
Benny4700
Haggis
DeanBrown79
Lance
MadManTed/SaintTeddington
That Girl
That Other Guy
Pooeyyeoop1
Somakitsune
GettingAncient
Magicality26
+A few other writers, who are being set up…

I would personally like to thank everyone from the above list for their contributions to our list of reviews. We did, at times, argue and complain with and about each other, some more than others. Those of whom I refer, are aware of who they are and as such, I will not be naming names.

Over the course of the last year, these people have not been my workers. They haven’t been my inferiors, my subordinates or even my colleagues. They have been my friends, nay, my family. I’ve gotten to know each and every one of them, to varying degrees, since they joined us and it saddens me to have had to say farewell to those who no longer remain. Some of them, well, some of them have made some amazing contributions not only to our list of reviews, but to our lives, in particular, my life. Almost every person on this list has either contributed to my life in some way and as such, I would consider it a travesty for them to be forgotten.

I was asked, the other week, how long I would write here, in essence, how long I will be a review-team leader. I didn’t know then and I still don’t know now, but what I do know is this… I’ll keep going for as long as I can access the internet and new resources to review. That Guy, is not just a pseudonym, but also a part of me now… I am That Guy and as far as I’m concerned, I always will be. I recall part of the conversation in which I was asked that question and I said, if I could, I would be reviewing my life, whilst I’m on my deathbed. It may have been a comical image, but right now, it feels as though that’s my major contribution to the world. I’m on the verge of becoming a legal adult in the UK and what do I have to show for the last 18 years of my life? A review site, with a team of trustworthy and loyal reviewers by my side. In a way, it saddens me that I haven’t done more, but as I write this, I realise that I have added to the lives of so many people, in some way. My writing, along with the writing of my brothers and sisters around me, has touched people from all over the world, be they from China or Brazil, Australia or France. Heck, we’ve even had Libyans looking us up. For all I know, we might have been the last website Gaddafi saw before he died. In a way, I hope so, because that’s history and that’s what I want us to become. Not today, not tomorrow, but some day and for the rest of eternity. I want us to be remembered.

*****

I realised that I started rambling there, so I’ll swiftly move on. I’d like to do a few special ‘thank-yous’ to individual writers now, with the intention of writing one for everyone. I could do these personally, but heck, I want them to read this post. It’s already 991 words long as it is and I doubt most of you will still be reading it right now. If you are, then I take my metaphorical hat off to you as well. Anyway. To the messages.

Benny – Over the last few years, we’ve been a combination of mortal enemies, partial nemesis, unwitting friends and now, finally, artificial brothers. The two of us have, in my opinion, been on a rockier road than Ross and Rachel (try saying that when you’re drunk, instead of Chubacabra) and to be honest with you, I wouldn’t have it any other way. You have changed my life so much over the last few years and now that I think about it, there are so few people from where we met, that I would even consider as close or as great a friend as you. You are, in essence, the Sheldon to my Leonard, the Spock to my Jim, the Watson to my Sherlock and to you, I am truly grateful. Ben. Thank you…

Haggis – I’ve known you since the 17th May, 2011 and by God, it feels like I’ve known you much longer. We’ve been through so much together, on the virtual battlefield, yet despite the lack of actually seeing each other, I feel as though I’ve known you for a large chunk of my life. You are, and always will be, my best internet friend. Unless I befriend, oh, I dunno, Natalie Portman or something. For those of you at home who read this, it is an in-joke and I hope to God that he doesn’t explain it to you. That goes for anyone else who gets it… I’m watching you! Scott. Thank you…

DeanBrown79 – Dean. My 2nd best internet friend. What can I say? I met you when I met Haggis and I feel as though I hardly know you. To be honest, I still half-believe that you’re a descendant of the black community. I know you’re not, but so convincing is your argument that I feel obliged to agree. I know your time with us was short, but the time you were with us, I remember with an eager mind and a fond heart. Well, not too fond. No homo! Thank you Dean…

Lance – Good ol’ Lance. I’ve not spoken to you since before you left our team and I don’t even know if you still read what we write, but in the off-chance that you do, I am glad that we conversed. Again, we never really spoke, but as far as I’m concerned, we were as close as we could possibly be. You wrote well and it was you that got me started with the position advertising. I owe you so much and although you wrote so little for us, it was more than enough. Lance. Thank you…

Ted – My dear friend Ted. You are and probably always have been, despite our differences, my closest college friend. You are one of the few people I’ve actually met that I’ll be sorry to say goodbye to, along with everyone else here, of course. Of the college group that we became a part of, you were always my favourite and although that may be unfair, I’m sure it’s not a surprise to everyone else from that group. Ted, you’re amazing and I can guarantee that somewhere, in some alternate universe, created by chance, rather than a deity, I’m finding a much better way of telling you how much I appreciate what you’ve done, not just over the last year, but during the time since we met. Thank you Ted.

That Girl – That Girl. The one person on this list who I have hurt in some way. I regret it all, even the involuntary stuff. I never should have done any of it and if I could take it back, I would, but I can’t, so I’m afraid my apparently half-hearted apologies will have to make do. Where do it all go wrong? I know where and I’m sure you do as well, but since that’s in the past and there’s nothing we can do about it now, I’d just like you to know that of all of the women that have written here, you are my favourite. Yes, you’re the only one, but that’s not the point. You helped me in ways I’d never have thought possible and for that, I’m truly thankful. Yes, you hurt me, but I hurt you more and I really am sorry. That Girl. Thanks… And again… I’m sorry…

That Other Guy – BEN! How are ya’ doin’ buddy? God it’s been so long since we actually sat down and had one of our intelligent conversations… Unless you count the Pon Farr conversation we had a week before the Easter holidays. No? Me neither. You, my dear friend, have addled my mind. I’ve sunk to your level of witticism and insanity and you know what? I couldn’t care less. I’m glad I went out on that limb and chose to sit with and work with you in Applied Science. Although, to be honest, I’m blaming my grades on you. Thank you Ben.

Pooeyyeoop – Jordan. We both know the less I put here, the better…

Somakitsune – I hardly know you and we met on a skill sharing website. You have, in your time here, written better than most of the people I know, making you one of the few ‘ordinary’ people I probably won’t ever meet, that I would like to. You’ve made me laugh and you’ve made me yawn. Those are the two skills that make a writer and as far as I’m concerned, you’ve done all you can to achieve both of these. Keep up the good work. Thanks!

GettingAncient – I’ve not had much time to get to know you either, but as far as I’m concerned, you’re alright by me.

Magicality26 – Again, I’ve not had the time to get to know you yet, but, if my hopes and expectations are reached, we’ll get along like water in a jug, or something like that…

*****

So, there we have it. My heartfelt thank yous to all of our staff, past and present. All I can do now is tell you why I wrote them. I wrote them because I was going to resign. I was going to quit the site and give myself a few months off. Having written this post, I have been brought to the edge of tears as I remember all the great times I’ve had whislt writing here. I can quite literally feel a tear trying to escape right as I type these words. Kind of embaressing, really, when you take into account the fact that I’m in my college’s library, surrounded by a few dozen people I don’t know or like. Funny in a way.

Why am I not resigning? The good times. Simple as that. I cannot allow myself to leave those times behind. My whole life, at the moment, is consumed with working, virtual killing or writing and that’s a life I’m happy with. I want to write as a part of my career and the fact that I’ve made myself nearly cry whilst writing a simple anniversary post, makes me think that I might yet have what it takes to become the new Mark Twain, or the Charles Dickens of today. I don’t know, but whoever I end up becoming, in the written world, I know I’m going to need memories like these to get me through the lowlights of the career. I can’t give up on that which I have built up. I started on Great PC Games, but gave up at the first sight of boredom with the tasks at hand. Now, on the 5th consideration of resignation, I realise that I will always be a reviewer. I’m not a year-long reviewing kind of guy. I’m the kind of guy that makes reviews that stay true through the ages. I will always review and for that reason, I cannot resign… Although, if SOPA, or whatever it’s called, gets passed, we’re in serious trouble…

To everyone here, be they reader or writer, I want to thank you for everything you’ve done to help me to where I am today. The readers have been my motivation, whilst the writers have been my support. Without you all, I wouldn’t be as sure of my ability as I am now and I might just have given up again when it ogot tough. I don’t know how I’d have lived with myself if that had happened, so I owe you all a big one. Thank you.

*****

I’d also like to give a big thank you to all of the guest-writers we’ve had over the last year. You know the ones I mean. Ryan and GreatPCGames. I don’t think I’ve missed anyone, but if I have, I’m sorry and I do appreciate your assistance with the creation of new reviews for us. Sure, we post a lot of adverts here, but we wouldn’t have reached our quota of 365 posts before the end of a year. On behalf of everyone here at That Guy That Reviews Stuff, thank you…

*****

Here, I am leaving space for the other writers to leave a comment or two about how they feel, or anything else they may wish to comment about. Hopefully, this’ll go well and we won’t lost the whole post or something. I took ages writing this…

DeanBrown79

“TGTRS to me is a great way to cure boredom, and is a fantastic after-school read. To all of the current writers, keep up the good work!”

SaintTeddington

“I am honoured and pleasured to b a member of the team at TGTRS, and am deeply sorry for not contributing more and hope to remedy this situation!”
 
Benny4700
“Jordan, I am humbled and touched. contributing to this site has worked wonders me and I’m sure I speak for all of us when I say thank you and I hope we continue doing what we do so well for many years…Now where’s the bar…?”
 
That Other Guy
“Thank you That Guy, and feel free to blame me for the bad grades. I know I’ve only been on the site about half a year now, no, probably less actually; but I want to thank TG for the great opportunity he presented me with when he asked me to write with, oh sorry, for him. The first time he asked I actually refused due to excess college work, and that decision I will sort of regret, as I’m here now anyway. Who says persistance doesn’t pay off? And finally, thank you to all the readers, but especially to those who read my posts….
 
…One more thing, TG said earlier that I was, if a little, insane. I just want to point out for the record, as in the official record that, I am a little CRAZY, and I have seen a psychiatrist but I am not, at least completely, insane. Just saying. Now excuse me, I’m off to Benny’s imaginary bar…”
 
Somakitsune
“Wow. I feel humbled that you think so much of me, and proud to be a part of this operation. Although I haven’t been able to contribute much (you know, real life really sucks sometimes) I should be able to fix that soon enough. And now, I’m going to go drink lucozade until I bleed pure glucose. Thanks to Jordan, and thanks to the readers too :D”
  *****

Well, that’s it. That’s everything we have to say. I’d just like to thank you all again, on behalf of That Guy That Reviews Stuff, and to wish you all the best for the next year. It’s going to be fun, writing for you.

Yours,

That Guy,
Benny4700,
Haggis,
DeanBrown79,
Lance,
Ted,
That Girl,
That Other Guy,
Pooeyyeoop,
Somakitsune,
Getting Ancient
Magicality26

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